The Quotable Daddy

Some of you may be surprised to learn that I am a bit wordier around Abigail than one might normally be around a 2 year old. Or a 1 year old. Or an infant.

Vocabulary comes with the territory with me. If you’re wondering what I mean, you can watch this video. It presents a clear cut example of a sentence that is unlikely to avert disaster. Particularly when the potential disaster involves a pre-verbal, newly walking toddler.

But that’s more than a year old, the astute reader notes. Don’t you have any more recent examples of assuming toddlers are more verbose than current data suggests? Don’t you, in fact, have an example that inspired this very post.

Yes, as a matter of fact, I do. And I’m wondering how you made what seems to be a very specific and accurate guess.


Today, during her bath, Abigail wanted me to get her Elmo submarine to work. Well, Elmo’s sub has been in dry dock for some time, with no signs that he’ll be back to harrying the enemy shipping lanes any time soon. I tried to get him to work, but I wanted to make sure that Abigail understood that I probably wouldn’t succeed. I chose what turned out to be my favorite thing I’ve ever said to her. Jessica laughed from the other side of the house.

“Can you lower your expectations for Daddy?”

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3 Responses to The Quotable Daddy

  1. Michael Gorman says:

    Well, I hate to say that this sounds familiar. I caught a lot of flack years ago when I told a couple of toddler types who were eating some kind of dripping thing to stay on the linoleum. Later I told them to stay off the upholstery.
    I must say that both children have excellent vocabularies today. They also both live in homes with tile floors and leather couches.

  2. Rhoda says:

    Alex, you must get some of this from your Dad, because when Dillon and Erika were maybe 2 he gave them an open cup of something and told them to stay on the linoleum!!

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