The Quotable Abigail, Part 52

On her apparent solidarity with the plight of the wee folk: “We’re all leprechauns today.”

On the Kentucky Derby odds: “But Charming Kitten might win more than we expect.”

On things to shout from the other room when your parents have no reason to suspect otherwise: “Okay, I’m gonna be good.”

On ways to get your parents to answer a tricky counting question for you: “Pretend I’m the teacher and I’m asking.”

On how regularly you need to watch out for motorcycles: “Even under the ocean when you’re wearing a whale outfit and you see a shark.”

On the big questions: “Who even made the puzzle of my name?”

On things to shout when you’re quite angry: “No! Those are not similar!”

On why she is upset by her hair: “I look like Dark Vader!”

On why it’s okay to chew on my pants leg: “I’m biting for fear.”

On the word she wants me to sing a rhyme for: “Oranges.”

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